““Depression is not beautiful poetry and sympathy from loved ones and a beautiful girl crying in the middle of the night while her boyfriend holds her and whispers “I love you” over and over again. Depression is not dead flowers and lana del rey music and dark eyeliner and lipstick smearing your face as you cry in a dirty bathtub smeared with your own blood. Depression is a foul taste in your mouth and smell in your room because you don’t care enough to take a shower or brush your teeth. Depression is longing for the days you cry because feeling something is better than feeling nothing and being sad is better than the blunt anxiety that is a constant in the back of your mind. Depression is watching your friends slip away because you don’t care enough to call them or see them and in turn feeling lonely and ignored because it feels like they don’t care enough to call you or see you. Depression is watching your grades plunge because how can you care about them when you don’t even care if you live or die? Depression is having your teachers and your parents call you lazy and unmotivated and a deadbeat because of these grades and because your illness is so blind to them you have trouble convincing even yourself that it exists. Depression is your back aching from staying in bed for hours a day, hoping you can live out your life in bed until you don’t have to live anymore. Depression is staying up until five a.m. watching tv because if you turn everything off you will be alone with your thoughts and there is nothing on earth worse than that. Depression is groaning in disappointment and anxiety when you wake up the next morning. Depression is praying yet again that night that you don’t wake up. Depression is not romantic. It is not beautiful. It is disgusting, empty, ugly. It is a pain so deep and long lasting you forget how you ever were without it.” In honour of robin Williams”—Anonymous (via fixedpenny)
“Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.”—Ralph Waldo Emerson (via hqlines)
“He will brush against your thigh and pretend that he didn’t, and he’ll look you in the eyes and tell you he likes them. He will take the band out of your ponytail because he likes your hair long, he will let you listen to his favourite song and it will get stuck in your head. He will kiss your lips until they are numb and he will hold your hands until they go numb too. Don’t watch the sunset with him, because you won’t be able to watch it again without missing the smell of his cologne. Don’t make him call you by your nickname, because afterwards you won’t be able to hear it. Your heart will be heavy and so will your head but just remember you were beautiful before he said so.”—some advice i gave to a friend (via desc-end) (via s-enfuir)
“I guess our parents stayed together simply because they didnt have 7000 other people following them or liking their pictures at their disposal when their marriage or relationship got hard. Nowadays when our relationship hits the rocks we can just log in and get high of this false sense of security and appreciation.
We value our worth based on comments and inbox messages filled with colourful words that have no depth. Meanwhile, the person who loves you when there is no filter on your face becomes an option and the rest of the world who just sees your representative becomes priority. Don’t loose what is real chasing behind what only appears to be.”—Hazal Sandra (via im-so-fan-cy)
“You came so unexpected through the doors of my soul You sneaked in slowly and hit through my heart that the bloods vessels in every piece of me had your name written over it I was consumed off your name I was drugged up with lips and eyes”—S.M (Dear , Love) Short poem II (via blvckz0id)